Mourning customs and laws

What to Do After a Passing

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Passing at Home

A doctor must be called to the home to confirm the death and issue a death certificate.

If there is any suspicion of an unnatural death, a police permit must be obtained before burial.

You must contact the Ministry of Health with:

• Three copies of the death certificate
• Police authorization (if required)
• The deceased’s ID

This is necessary to obtain a burial permit.

With all the above documents, contact the nearest Chevra Kadisha (burial society) to arrange the funeral.

Passing in a Hospital

Prepare the deceased’s ID in order to receive a death certificate from the hospital.

In cases of death due to an accident or similar circumstances, a police permit is required.

Then, apply to the Ministry of Health for a burial license with:

• A signed death certificate (3 copies)
• The deceased’s ID

Afterward, contact the nearest Chevra Kadisha to schedule the funeral.

The immediate family has the right to object to an autopsy.

National Insurance Institute Guidelines

Burial

Burial in Israel is free of charge in the following cases:

• An Israeli resident who passed away in Israel and is buried in their place of residence
• An Israeli resident who passed away abroad and is buried in their place of residence in Israel

Burial costs are covered by the National Insurance Institute and transferred to the Chevra Kadisha.

Cases Where Payment May Be Required

• Purchasing a burial plot in advance (prices vary by location)
• Burial in an exceptional plot approved by the National Insurance Institute
• Burial in a location different from the deceased’s place of residence

Mourning Practices (General Overview)

The following are some of the common mourning laws and customs observed in Jewish tradition.

Those obligated to observe mourning are:

• Parents
• Children
• Siblings
• Spouse

After the passing, a memorial candle is lit in the home where the mourners sit shiva.

At the cemetery, mourners perform keriah (tearing of a garment), usually on the upper clothing, and it is customary to wear this garment throughout the shiva period.

From the time of death until burial, the mourner is in a state called aninut and is exempt from positive religious commandments.

After the Burial – Shiva (7 Days of Mourning)

During the seven days following burial, mourners refrain from:

• Work
• Bathing (full body)
• Wearing leather shoes
• Marital relations
• Studying Torah (with some exceptions)
• Greeting others
• Laundry and wearing freshly washed clothes
• Sitting on regular chairs
• Haircuts and shaving
• Leaving the house
• Participating in celebrations

Mourners sit on low seats during shiva. It is customary for neighbors to prepare the first meal (Seudat Havra’ah).

Kaddish is recited for the deceased for up to eleven months.

Before Burial (Aninut)

From death until burial, close relatives are considered onenim.

During this time:

• They are exempt from commandments
• Do not pray or wear tefillin
• Do not recite blessings
• Avoid eating meat and drinking wine
• Avoid bathing, grooming, and social interactions

However, they may recite Psalms in the presence of the deceased.

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Keriah (Tearing of Garments)

Mourners must tear their clothing as a sign of grief.

• A blessing is recited before tearing: “Blessed is the True Judge”
• The tear is made while standing
• For parents: tear on the left side
• For others: tear on the right side

Day of Burial

After burial:

• The Tziduk Hadin prayer is recited (when applicable)
• Mourners pass between two rows of people offering condolences
• The traditional phrase:
  “May the Omnipresent comfort you among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.”

It is customary to:

• Wash hands after leaving the cemetery (without drying them)
• Eat the first mourning meal prepared by others

Shiva Customs

• A candle remains lit throughout the seven days
• Mirrors are often covered
• Prayer services are held in the mourning house
• The mourner does not wear tefillin on the first day

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Thirty Days (Shloshim)

After shiva, mourning continues in a lighter form for 30 days:

• No haircuts or shaving
• No new clothing
• Limited participation in joyful events

One Year Mourning (for Parents)

Mourning for parents continues for 12 months:

• Avoid celebrations
• Recite Kaddish (typically for 11 months)
• Some customs include studying Mishnah and leading prayers

Unveiling the Tombstone

It is customary to place a tombstone (matzevah) on the grave.

• Usually installed by the 30th day
• Sometimes after one year
• Includes the deceased’s name, parent’s name, and date of passing (Hebrew date)
• Often ends with: “May their soul be bound in the bond of life” (ת.נ.צ.ב.ה)

Yahrzeit (Anniversary of Death)

Observed annually on the date of passing:

• Lighting a memorial candle
• Reciting Kaddish
• Visiting the grave
• Studying Mishnah

Visiting the Cemetery

When visiting:

• Recite Psalms and memorial prayers
• Place a small stone on the grave as a sign of remembrance
• Wash hands upon leaving

Respectful behavior is required:

• No eating or drinking
• Modest dress
• Do not step on graves

Condolence (Nichum Aveilim)

Comforting mourners is considered a great mitzvah.

Visitors should:

• Wait for the mourner to speak first
• Offer words of comfort
• Say upon leaving:
  “May the Omnipresent comfort you among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.”